Friday, June 27, 2008

Winnie! The Poo...

Last night after dinner I let the dogs out as usual and when Winston affectionately known as Winnie, came back in, the smell of dog-doo filled the kitchen. Oh my god, he must've stepped in it or something, and he was trotting off toward the rug as quickly as his soiled little feet would carry him. Of course by little, I mean large!

"Winston! Come here!" I called out in a panic. I ducked into the bathroom and grabbed one of the "dog towels" and spread it out on the floor. He walked all around it, careful not to step on it trying to get to me. Finally I was able to grab him and navigate him ONTO the towel. I wiped each of his feet on it, and nothing came off, but the odor was stronger than ever.

Fearfully I looked in the direction of his butt, and lo and behold there it was, lots of it, soft and hanging is his long hair and on his tail. I pulled the towel off the floor and attempted to reach toward the offending end of the dog. Winnie doesn't like anyone including other dogs to go near that area. He has a strange social phobia for a dog. I tried again, he ran away from me.

I gave chase through the living room swiping at him when was within range. He ran around in circles to avoid contact, and little pieces were dislodging and flying all around the room and onto the rugs. I was expending a lot of energy and went through quite a selection of towels. I never worked so frickin hard to do something that so deeply repulsed me in my whole life.

Finally, he laid down and let me finish trying to clean him up. I was down to wash cloths by that time. Then I had to run around with a scrub brush and soapy water looking for all the little spatters throughout the kitchen and living room. Ah, the joys of pet ownership. Tomorrow, Winston is getting his summer hair cut!


yenbar said...

Sounds like an all around fun evening for you.
I have heard that when cats start messing themselves like this, there is something wrong with them and you should get them looked at immediately. Not sure if this applies to dogs also.

RED MOJO said...

yenbar, I hate to be a non-alarmist, but all he needs is a hair-cut.;)

Baino said...

. . we call them 'dags' out here! (bits of poo that stick to a sheep's butt) Also a disparaging name for someone who is less than fashionable! as in "You're such a dag'

Call me OC but I find it easier to strip off and wash the dog in the shower! Then I have a Pantene pooch who likes the pampering!

TheWeyrd1 said...

And this is why I don't own pets...but secretly I have been checking into dog adoption. Thanks for the warning.

comfortandjoy said...

RM: I've read this post more than once because it makes me laugh out loud. It's sort of a rare thing, so thank you.


RED MOJO said...

baino, my little angel is 90 pounds of "Hell No" when it comes to getting him into the tub. Otherwise, call me OC too!

theweyrd1, He could spatter poo all over my house, I would still love him!

cj, thanks for finding this story funny! That was the desired effect!

Certain Magician said...

"Fearfully I looked in the direction of his butt" Very highbrow potty humor indeed!

tsduff said...

I had a beagle named Winston - great name. As for the joys of pet ownership... bleah! Dingleberries are horrible to deal with on a doggie with long hair.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I had several Bouviers, one of which was named Winnie, and I can totally relate to your delight at trying to de-poo a large shaggy dog.

Isn't it amazing how they instinctively seek out rugs to rub it off on?

I liked your observation that you had never worked so frickin' hard to do something that so deeply repulsed you. Perversity is a necessary quality for pet owners.

RED MOJO said...

CM, You always know what to say.

tsduff, dingleberries, my dog doesn't use toilet paper! lol

heartinsanfrancisco, yes, you feel me, I can tell. We are a perfect pair of perverts!