Well, the way I see it, I am the only one who is going to make sure I get what I want. I have a list, and it's specific. Some items are negotiable, some are not! I can trade this for that, remain flexible, make compromises, to a point. Once I reach that point, I need to move on.
What am I talking about? Dating. To me dating is a series of interviews, a weeding out process. Some are weeded out in the first 5 minutes, others take more time. There are several different components that need to work.
Communication is a tough one. It takes some time, but you can determine potential fairly quickly.
Compatibility is hard at first too. People are more accommodating when they first meet than they may be later, and Comedy can be strained at first by nerves, but not for too long. I need to laugh! I think fun is...fun!
If you don't have these four essential ingredients, your relationship will fail. Yes, you can stay with someone until you die without all four, but to be happy, you need them all, at least I do. But, things can become complicated quickly and before you know it, you're closing your eyes to all kinds of signs or red flags that it's not going to work.